|Trent Cole, leader of the murder squad D-Line|
1. People who don't play football but think they know about it: I know that our team did bad, but you telling me what we did wrong using terms you learned on Sportscenter this morning is not going to do anything but make me despise you on a cellular level.
2. Jerry Jones: What about Jerry Jones doesn't bother me would be an easier question to answer. He tries as hard as he can to be successful and fails miserably every time. The way the camera men show his reaction every time Tony Romo throws a pick brings a smile to my face. He BOUGHT a superbowl ring, and is stuck in the 90's like every other cowboys fan ever.
3. People who remember things when you get in the car: Everyone is in the car, ready to go, and now someone decides they forgot something. They couldn't have said anything or got what they needed before everyone was ready, but now that they can hold up the group they take advantage of it.
4. When people crinkle/fold their money or have the faces facing the wrong way: Are you some sort of savage, uncivilized beast that can't own a wallet? The best thing in the whole entire world is a crisp bill, and those who taint that are equivalent to Satan in my eyes.
5. When people are wrong and can not except it: Hey buddy, you are wrong, accept it. Every single point you made in your argument has been proven to be wrong and you still think you are right. Their unbelievable stubbornness, and unwavering pride makes them look even more stupid than being wrong in the first place.
6. People who ask me why I like the Eagles: I know its unbelievably hard to even comprehend, but yes, I live in Massachusetts and I like the Philadelphia Eagles. I am a connoisseur of football and appreciate the Eagles fundamentals. A 4-3/3-4 defense who blitzes 90% of the time and a west coast offense that throws 70% of the time, whats not to love? And the Eagles defensive line is a straight murder squad
7. Eli Manning: So you Patriots fans think you hate Eli, that's funny. You guys have only had a couple years of despising this man, Eagles fans invented it. I am not kidding one bit when I say that if i was ever close enough to him, I would throw batteries at him in a true Eagles fan spirit.
8. Andy Reid: There's no denying that he was the best coach in Eagles history, but after years of draft busts and obvious coaching mistakes, the guy looses his shine. Every time Kansas City is mentioned I can't help but think of how they'll hate his walrus looking face in 10 years.